March 23, 2021

As I stepped back thinking about my journey, I realized that it was not two lives but I had lived a multiple, one life touched by so many people in a positive as well as challenging way that it moulded me into the person, I am.

 Some lives very much resonating with many Mumbaikars, and some parts typically different.

A life as a child through adolescence in a small Mumbai home,

A life as a painter

A life as a dancer

A life as an NCC cadet

A life as a mountaineer

A life as a Airline staff

A life in boots.. I know that’s the most interesting part and the reason why I am here…

A life as a traveller 

A life as wife and mother

A life in heels if that’s what we want to call the corporate life…

My parents, struggling to make ends meet in a humble Mumbai home, showed us very early in life the importance of gaining experiences, learning new things and trying new things, without inhibition.

Our upbringing was one of materialistic scarcity, but abundant in love and sharing.

Every work of the house was equally shared irrespective of age, and gender, my brother did the dishes while we cleant. It didn’t make a difference the other way round.

We ran in to grab every opportunity to participate in all events, contests, be it singing, art etc. My mother’s motto was …enjoy being there, and learn… don’t worry about losing or winning.

As a youngster, I used to be asked what will you do, I was clueless, but I was sure that I would try to be the best at what I do.

I got into the renowned college for commerce… Narsee Monjee college with a distinction.. While academics were the focus, I participated in all the possible College festivals, sang at NCPA with the church and choir groups, won few laurels for the college for dance, dramatics, and art.

Having been trained in BharatNatyam, I performed across various stages in Mumbai, and thus enjoyed the rich tradition and culture of India, through my gurus, who taught a young Catholic girl insights into our rich culture and tradition, by relating both the religions, mythologies and stories.

I accidentally landing up joining the NCC. My first encounter to something close to the armed forces. As an NCC cadet I represented my state at various levels, and was also awarded the International Award for Young People in the year 1997, by HRH Prince Philip 

Burdening our parents with our wants was never an option for us. We were taught to work our way through college. I saved up with a little earnings through sales roles in shops and exhibitions, tuitions. I loved algebra… I could sell Algebra like a cake, to any child then.

I took up travel and Tourism as my vocational subjects, and took up travelling. In college days, I remember going on a general ticket to New Jalpaiguri …sitting on a door way of the train, something unheard of for a young Mumbai girl. As a youngster, in college I spent my summers at the Himalayan mountaineering institute, Darjeeling, and later on in life went to climb the Nehru peak and the Gangotri Peak two a height of 23580 ft.

All this contributing to my thoughts of needing to do something different in life.

Yes my parents and me worked mutually towards a trust factor, so that they allow me to do all of this, rather be with me for all this and encourage me. On a lighter note, to be on the safe side, my dad got my insurance done. My siblings definitely took the brunt of the anxieties that my parents had when I was away, and I am thankful for their support.

After graduation, British Airways – happened with a typical desk job, and it lasted 6 long months, When I saw an ad in the newspaper for the Women entry for officers in the Indian Army and I applied for it and got through the UPSC selection board. I was 21 then.

My life in the armed forces, was a struggle that my coursemates and many more women have won only this year, 2021. While I hung my boots in physical form in the year 2009, my batchmates have continued till date, the historical order was passed just recently where many of my counterparts will receive permanent commission.

The academy had toughened us. It had made me an officer, out of a young girl. The training of the Academy kind of makes you so adaptable, agile and robust, afterall it needs you to get ready for the ultimate sacrifice when needed. We would start of early mornings by making our beds, the drill instilled in us a sense of discipline. At the beginning we were punished, if our own beds had creases, but subsequently the order moved to group punishments even if one bed in the dorm was not in order. This instilled, teamwork and team discipline, which meant we were responsible for our buddies too. There was a cadet number assigned to us. The rigour of the training made you forget your name too, all we remembered was a cadet number.

I was commissioned into the Army Service corps a Combat Logistics Corp then.

In most of the units that I was posted in my early years I was the first woman officer, and had to live through the proving and showing that yes we could do it. You needed to be with the troops doing it their way if you had to win their hearts and subsequently lead them.

Women in the Armed forces, then, were getting commissioned into Signals, Engineering, Ordinance, Supplies and logistics, intelligence, Law, Electrical and Mechanical Engineers. They led convoys, maintained signals, led bridge building teams and much more.

We learnt to drive a load carrier, change spare wheels in minutes. I was first posted in an Air maint unit, which took care of the air supplies to Siachen glacier and the northern region. My typical day started at 3 am in the morning, to supervise the loading of the sorties that would take flight by 5 am. Then physical training, office work, we tied parachutes in the afternoons, and played games with the troops in the evening.

The Army gets you moving after 2 years to new locations, new teams, new roles, and hence you land up being versatile, you are geared up for every role, since there is no “NO”.

I travelled as part of my next tenure with a special task in the Ladakh region, working with civilians on a project to win hearts and minds of the people. I used to travel to all border villages trying to motivate women to come out in support of the initiatives the army was doing. We worked on multiple projects throughout the Ladakh and Kargil region on the upliftment of the border areas with the civilian authorities.

From there I landed in a riot stricken Ahmedabad, then the deserts of Rajasthan, in the West to the hills of Arunachal in the East.

Then I came to phase in my life which left me very devastated, in the year 2004, I had a very casual accident in my room where I injured my back. I thereafter, missed reporting for a pre Everest Expedition which was to Kailash Parbhat, and then the Everest. That was a depressing time for me.

I knew mountaineering was a distant dream…

But with the support of my dear ones, prayer, yoga , and the discipline that was instilled in me, I got moving. I started with a strict regime starting 3:30 am yoga, and prayer, and slow walks, thus went from lying motionless on the bed to, sitting up to walking and then running in a years time. During this time I had an opportunity to visit a retreat where, a nun told me to aspire to walk the mountains Jesus walked.

And coincidently, or God’s plan you may say, after a year and half, I was selected for a UN mission to Israel and Syria. Oh yes, I walked the mountains HE walked, a spiritual peak for me. I climbed all the Wadis around the Golan Heights, Mt Hermon, Mt Tabor, where we were positioned as observers between the conflicted Syria and Israel belt.

I may not call myself a prayerful person, but the Bible has always been a guiding strength in my life, a “Go To” Book of the sorts. My parents encouraged us to find strength in there.

UN was quite a challenging tenure when working with the troops of 14 different nations. I yet remember my immediate reportee was an Austrian gentleman, a reserve force personnel who was a 6 footer. He did mention in a casual conversation to our Jamaican boss that he did not appreciate taking orders from an Indian and that too a woman. So I realized that this is a universal dilemma. And that I should not be taking it personally. I was glad that by the end of the tenure we had managed to work on the differences.

AT the UN, you bore your national flag on the uniform that you wear. I mailed a picture to my mom and she said, “we wear the flag on our chest probably twice a year, but you are wearing it every day my girl, I am proud of you.” She couldn’t believe that exactly 3 years before this pic I was in excruciating pain, in the hospital undergoing physio, and traction.

I quit the forces after a completed tenure of 10 years and joined the corporate world in the year 2010…retail, consulting and now into banking at Fino Payments bank as the Head of HR. The heel’s world is as challenging as it may seem. The way of life was too different. I initially found it chaotic. A rush… a chase… each one on his own way and hence I decided to take it systematically and slow. I attempted to understand the need of my role in every org, and see what impact was expected out of me, explicitly or otherwise. I worked on myself to understand the corporate jargon, I attended the PG course. I knew that I had to bring in my team building capabilities, delegation as per strengths, and discipline into the workplace. I did see that the struggle for women continues. It may not be so explicit as it was in the army. But I did see a young mother struggle, between the crèche, the travel, the family the workplace. A woman business leader struggle for deadlines, profitability balancing home and office. What I realized was that a strengths based approach like in the armed forces was best to build complimenting teams around you. We cannot be the best everywhere, but what we all can do is, be there for each other. There are times when we need the kind of support, which cannot be sought from books or distant online connects. We need the in persons around us and that’s what I believed and tried to work upon.

The armed forces had inbuilt in us a buddy system. Hence we need to really work on our relationships be it at homes or offices our living areas etc. Build enabling partners around us.

This life is too short, to not enjoy the small pleasures, and get engrossed in the unwanted nuances around us. Be patient. Choose your battle. I am here today since my husband and my family, my extended family have been supporting me so much, and so is my team and my peers at work.

Nowadays, we are very quick to choose a Nuclear family lifestyle, not understanding the kind of support we miss by staying away from our parents. Today’s children miss the supportive story telling care of grans. According to me it’s too big a price we are paying. And I will encourage nuclear families to rethink, though it’s difficult at times.

Well I believe in the circle of life, there is no final destination apart from the last exit. The final attrition. Till then there is always room for something new. Try something new, you can become an author, you can become a poet, you can become a painter, a tailor, a gardener, may be a bad one of the sorts, but do try. My advice to young parents is equip your children, not only girls but also boys with the right kind of attitude to do everything that comes their way, speak to them on the differentiation of right from wrong, teach them to choose, understand. We have to learn that they are part of a way too different world.

Each of us is unique with each of us having many …such unique experiences … its just that some have been able to join the dots differently, to keep going. Never giving up or settling with the status quo.

Be yourself

This world will set you for Ups and Downs

Its only you who can turn it around.

Let not the fear of the unknown weigh you down

You are the image of a creator, but Oh woman don’t burden under the crown

Know and understand that each of us is unique

Compete if you must, with yourself and not your colleague

Be yourself

Be open to listening, its okay to fail

Its better to say a no at times, its better to let go the bait

Be all that you can be,

its rarely a waste of time to pursue something new.

How good or bad the result, does not matter,

it’s the journey that renews…

Yes Woman, you can build your destiny

Cause a woman’s one tru calling is natural versatility.

Major Pratima Pinto Thomas

Post Graduate Business Management, (NMIMS)

Masters Human Resources Development Management (Jamnalal Bajaj Institute of Management Studies

Major, Army Service Corps

 

Staff Officer Logistics, United Nations Organization

 

All India Head HR, Fino Payments Bank Ltd